Bound By Ink
by Mommy Bear
Summary: "You have one final test to complete."  Lord Danzo looked from Shin over to Sai.  Danzo's face was as cold as ice.  "You will conquer your feelings.  One of you will have to die." He again looked from brother to brother.


Author's Notes

This is a story about two young boys who call themselves brothers. The story takes place deep in the "Root" of Konoha. The older brother has the name of Shin. The younger brother eventually becomes known as Sai. It is known that Sai didn't receive his name until before he joined Team Kakashi. In this story we will refer to them as Shin and Sai to avoid confusion . However, in this story they mostly address each other as "brother". Please read and enjoy my story.

I do not own Naruto

Bound By Ink

Shin sat on the edge of his bed, his bare feet dangling. He was thinking about nothing. His mind was numb, totally numb. He wasn't even sure he wanted to think about anything, not after the events of today. Then his eye caught movement of his younger brother. He didn't know that his brother was awake.

"Brother," Shin spoke quietly in the dimness of the room, "I thought you were asleep.

"No, " Sai replied. "I'm not sleepy"

"Me either." Shin replied. "There aren't many left are there?" Shin said very solemnly.

Sai remained quiet for a moment, then in a whisper replied, "No there aren't." He knew Shin was referring to the boys who were in training for the Root, to protect Konoha.

Today the red haired boy had died at the hand of the boy who wore the blue glove. Shin had seen the two boys together a lot. They trained together, ate together, shared a room together. They were friends. Friends, he had almost forgotten that word. Lord Danzo wanted that word erased, wiped out or their minds. Emotions were forbidden in the Root.

The older brother watched his younger brother closely. They weren't really brothers, but somehow, in spite of all Lord Danzo tried to erase – the two had formed a bond much like he imagined brothers would. Neither boy knew if they had ever had a real brother. Everything before coming to the Root and Danzo Sama had been erased. They had no name, no past, and no memory.

Shin spoke to his younger brother, "I saw you drawing today. What were you drawing?" Sai remained silent for a few minutes, then slowly got up and took a picture from under the mattress. "See," he said showing the picture to Shin.

Shin stared at it. There they were, two boys in battle, one with red hair and the other with a blue glove. Shin knew this drawing would be the only proof that the rad haired boy had ever existed. Shin then spoke to his brother, "I am glad you drew this picture." Sai stared at him blankly, "Why, its not important. I just draw what I see."

"Well," Shin replied, "It proves existence."

His brother shrugged his shoulders and put the picture back under the mattress, "So? we have no names, we don't exist, lest Danzo Sama says," Sai replied blankly.

Shin watched the younger brother, "you should draw more you know."

"Why," the younger brother asked.

Shin grinned, then hurried and wiped the grin off his face. If Lord Danzo saw that, he would be in trouble. "Well, for one thing you are very good. I like to look at what you draw., it makes me smile"

"Smile, that is forbidden and you know that," Sai commented flatly.

His older brother just shrugged his shoulder and ignored him.

Sai's face was a blank , "Well I won't be drawing much more unless I get some ink."

Shin shook his head, "You go through a lot of ink. Why does Lord Danzo allow you to draw anyway?"

Sai's eyes were closed, "My jutsus are ink. That is my power. I need ink for them.

Shin studied his brother, "Don't you make your own ink?"

Sai nodded the affirmative, "The plants are hard to find."

"So," Shin replied, "Lets go tomorrow and find some. You really need to draw more. Besides we can train on the way." Sai nodded once. "Tomorrow." He thought that his older brother always showed too much emotion, this could not be good, but he did need more special ink.

Shin and Sai ran through the early morning dawn. The older brother out in front and the younger brother behind. Shin suddenly threw a shuriken through the air. He struck a large twig severing it off the tree. Sai shook he head, ~he always shows off~. Suddenly Sai tripped and landed flat on his face, knocking the wind out of him. "oomph". A bit daze, he shook his head and tried to get up. Suddenly he saw a hand reached out to him. Looking up he looked right into the eyes of his brother. "You gotta pay more attention to where you're going." Sai looked into his brothers face, and for a moment he thought he saw a grin. In confusion Sai reached out and took his hand and climbed to his feet. He didn't know what he was suppose to say, so he said nothing.

It took most of the morning to find the right plant. Only a certain one would do. "This is it," Sai said with a little excitement. They had found what they was looking for. Shin reached out to touch it. "Don't do that," Sai said flatly. "It is poisonous."

"Oh," Shin stared at Sai. "So how do you gather it?"

"I use gloves." Sai pulled a pair of gloves from his pouch and put them on. Carefully he moved the dirt from around the plant and dug it up, root and all. "The root is the most poisonous, the leaf is safe, but I mostly use the blossom, with a bit of root.

"Can't you just pick the blossom?" the older brother asked with curiosity.

"No, you need the whole plant to keep the blossoms alive until you are ready to use it." Carefully Sai put the plant into a bag and tucked it into his pack. "Okay we can go."

"One, you need only one?" Shin asked.

"It makes a lot of ink and it lasts a long time." Sai removed his gloves and put them in a separate bag.

"But what about the colors, how do you get so many colors from one blossom." Shin was very curious.

"What I mix with it depends on what colors I get." Sai informed him.

The two brothers headed back. They took their time and practiced with their shurikens, kunais and tantos. They sparred with each other and ran up and down the trees like squirrels chasing each other.

Then Sai took a few minutes using almost all of his current ink supply to draw the scenery around them. Shin stood and silently watched with amazement as his brother skillfully drew with his many colors. He wished he could draw with such skill. Patting his brother on his back he gathered up his practice gear and they headed back to the Root. Sai was quiet, thinking about the ink he would make when they got back, but Shin continued to babble on, as he usually did when he and Sai were alone. They entered the building where they housed themselves oblivious to Danzo who was standing in a darkened doorway. ~This will not do.~ Danzo grumbled under his breath. ~This will not do.~

Two days later Sai was bent over a cooking pot, mixing and boiling his ink blossoms. He had gloves on both his hands. "Hey, too bad you can't just draw a bottle of ink and have one." Shin gave a laugh. Sai looked at his brother. Such a display of mirth was unacceptable to the root. Yet, in spite of that, Sai almost grinned. He had become really fond of his brother. Then he repeated the words to himself: "In root, you have no name, you have no feelings, you have no past, you have no future. All that exists is the mission." His mission now was to make ink. Ink for his jutsus and his drawings. Danzo had drilled and drilled all the root members in exactness. They were loyal only to the mission. If his brother didn't quit making light of things and showing emotion, what would happen to him?

Sai filled his ink bottles with his new ink. His brother had watched the whole process very carefully. He noticed Sai used special pans for heating and mixing the ink. "How come you use special pans for the ink. Can't you just use regular one and wash them out.

The younger brother stopped short, then without any feeling he said "No, if you ingest ink you'll die."

"Just that quick, like that?" Shin asked.

"I don't really know. I just know that you die. I suppose it happens rather quick especially with some of the root in it," shrugging his shoulders he went back to work. Shin watched over Sai's shoulder. He was mesmerize at the skill Sai had, not to mention his artistic ability.

That night, while Shin was asleep, Sai carefully took his book from under his mattress and slowly turned the pages. In the darkness he could barley make out the sketch of each of their fighting matches which he had so carefully drawn. Shin's in the front of the book going toward the center and Sai's in the back of the book going toward the center. They would come together in the middle and... and what, he wondered. He stared at the blank center pages. What drawing would be there? ~Of course~ He smiled at the though, it was dark and no one could see him smile in the dark. Then hurriedly wiped the smile off his face and closed the book, returning it under his mattress. He closed his eyes in sleep.

The two brothers became almost inseparable. This did not go unnoticed by Danzo, who kept a close watch on the two. Danzo knew they were both strong and excellent fighters. They were the strongest of the young Root. No doubt they would both do well in the Root, if they could conquer their feelings.

The brothers watched more of their comrades die. Each by the hand of their "friend" as Shin would say. "Brother, I don't have a good feeling about this." he told Sai.

"You are not to have any feelings about this." Sai stated. "That is why we do it. To rid ourselves of feeling anything." Yet deep down Sai found he was beginning to feel abit like Shin. They trained together, they did everything together. Even laugh, which was forbidden. When Sai drew his pictures, Shin was there encouraging him .

The morning brought rain as they gathered once more to watch another battle. Sai sat in the foreground with his brush and ink in his hand. He wanted to catch every detail of today's fight as it was between Shin and the boy with the blue glove. Both had their weapons, Shin had his shurikens and his tanto, while the other had a long saber. The fight went back and forth with Shin wielding his tanto with great skill and the other, his long saber. Danzo kept a close eyes on Shin knowing he was one of the strongest of the group. His skill had now far surpassed everyone else. Lord Danzo knew if Shin failed, it would be his emotions that had gotten in the way. He had to root out those foolish emotions from Shin or he would be a failure. But in the end, it was Shin's skill with the double shuriken in its own shadow that gave him the victory. The boy with the blue glove lay dead on the ground. Sai captured every line and crease in his brothers face even to the tiny traces of emotion that were hidden to the untrained eye. Only Sai's skillful eye and Danzo caught the emotions.

As Shin passed by his brother and looked at the drawing, he frowned. Sai could see that his brother was clearly displeased, "Brother, does my drawing displease you?" Sai questioned.

"No, it is not your drawing that displeases me." Shin said with a sad tone.

Sai sat there in silence for a moment. "Then what displeases you?"

"This" he said and pointed to the dead body of the boy. This displeases me," and Shin walked off.

Sai thought ~Those feelings again~ "In Root you have no name, you have no feelings..."

Sai was not the only one to notice the look of emotion in Shin's face. Lord Danzo approached Shin, "You will overcome your emotions. You have one final test to complete." Lord Danzo looked from Shin over to Sai. Danzo's face was as cold as ice. "You will conquer your feelings. One of you will have to die." He again looked from brother to brother.

Shin grabbed his tanto from its sheath side steping his brother's attack. Sai was fast with his tanto as he made a slicing motions toward Shin's neck. Shin did a flip up and over Sai. Brother fought against brother. The older brother's shurikens flew, this time two in the shadow of the first. Nearly slicing Sai's arm. Sai lunged to the left as he pulled out a scroll. Quickly he drew a beast which immediately took to the air after Shin. Shin jumped to the tree and flung his tanto at the beast splattering the ink. In the blackness of the ink the older brother threw a small knife pinning Sai's left arm to the ground. Shin landed beside Sai with sweat dripping down his face. He swung his tanto at Sai's neck and froze. It seemed that Shin was in an endless time. Everything stopped, motionless, he heard Lord Danzo in his mind "You will conquer your feelings or one of you will die." Immediately the Brother Shin began to repeat.."In Root you have..." Shin threw his tanto aside, he could not do it. He could not kill his brother. Sai grabbed his kunai and with an expressionless face a blank as the middle pages of his book, he plunged it into Shin.

Shin coughed and sputtered as he sat up. What the? He was in his bed. It was a dream. A nightmare to be more precise. He stood up shakily. He needed to clear his mind. The truth was hard and clear, he could not do it. He could not kill his brother. He would not kill his brother, yet he knew his brother could kill him. If his younger brother killed him, the guilt would destroy him. But what if he felt no guilt, then his younger brother would still be destroyed, just differently.

Shin walked across the cold stone floor to the window. The breeze was cool and the night air was clear. Shin grabbed the window ledge to steady himself. He felt sick, sick in his heart and what was to happen to him and his brother? How could they do this? His hand touched something hard. The book! Sai's book was there on the window ledge. Shin began to flip through the pages reliving each pages, whether it be his fight or his brothers. The older brother stopped at the center blank pages. He knew what was to be there. They had discussed their dreams and hopes many times. If he killed Sai, he would not be able to live with himself, and if Sai killed him... A tear slid down Shin's cheek. Quickly he wiped it off. That was weakness, nothing but weakness. He was weak, but he didn't care about that. . He cared only about his little brother.

Clutching the book, Shin stood there for an unknown amount of time, trying to clear his mind. Thinking about what to do. Running away would not work. The Root was excellent and would track him down. If they both left, both would be tracked down and killed when found. The Root assassins were expert and would track them until they were found. Shin rubbed his hand across the cover of the book. It was unlike Sai to leave it out. Perhaps he was letting the ink dry. He set the book back on the sill, bumping something in the dark. The ink bottle, He had not seen it when he picked up the book. With careful hands he picked up the ink and turned it around and around in his hand thinking.

An hour later Shin lay in bed. His breathing was rapid and he was profusely perspiring, Shin rolled over on his stomach to help stop the cramping in his gut. He tasted the bile in his mouth and felt he would loose the contents of his stomach, but he fought to keep it down. His head was spinning and pounding like thunder in a storm. By morning he felt somewhat better as he climbed out of his cot. By the time he reached the door a wave a nausea passed over him and he passed out with a crash. Sai woke up with a start and ran to his brothers aid. He helped him to his cot. "I'll get some help."

"No," Shin choked out. "I'll be alright. Help me to my cot." The younger brother helped his older brother to the cot. Sai sat beside Shin until time for breakfast, knowing full well he would be interrogated when his brother wasn't there.

Lord Danzo stood in front of Sai. His tall form would have been intimidating to one how had emotions. Sai stood straight and tall before his master. "Where is the other one?" His voice was low and even with no fluctuation in his tone.

Without hesitation the younger brother gave his answer. "He is sick Lord Danzo."

"Sickness is a sign of weakness," Danzo answered back.

"Yes sir, I know ." Sai tried to keep his voice as even as his Master's.

Lord Danzo's eye seemed to peer through the young boy. "Take him to the medic room as soon as we are through here."

"Yes Danzo Sama," leaving his unfinished breakfast Sai headed back to the room to help Shin to the medic room.

The medic stood facing Lord Danzo. "I do not know what is causing this boy's condition. It seems that he cannot keep food in his stomach and his heart rate has accelerated to a dangerous level at times he is incoherent and in a lot of pain.

Danzo stared at the medic. "And you have no idea what has caused this condition?"

"No sir, " the medic replied.

"Then this boys condition is critical." The Root Lord asked.

"Yes sir, he will not survive if this keeps up. I am unable to figure it out." The medic was clearly baffled.

Lord Danzo looked straight at the medic, "Then I suggest you better hurry before I loose my best Root member. There will be no fight tomorrow with his present condition."

The medic showed no trace of any emotion as he nodded his head and gave a slight bow to his Master. "Yes, sir." and Danzo walked slowly away, his cane tapping a rhythm on the floor.

The younger brother watched his older brother threw the window. His brothers vomiting came again. Anyone would have flinched as the wretchedness of this illness, but not Sai. He wanted to go in and help his brother, but he knew this was not allowed.

A couple of days passed by and it appeared that Shin was getting better. He was sent back to his room. That night Sai woke and saw his brother standing by the window. He walked over to him and put a hand around his shoulder, "Brother are you feeling better?" Before Shin could answer, Sai's other hand hit something in the window will. "My ink, I thought I put it away." he picked up the bottle, "I didn't realize that I had uses so much ink." He took the bottle and put it in his case.

"Go to sleep brother," Shin told him.

The next morning Shin was very sick. He had a high fever and sever stomach pain. He was vomiting and his breathing was labored. Sai sat by his sick brother and put a cloth on the fevered brow, and draw the scenes he could view from their small room window. His drawings seemed to be the only thing that brought comfort to his brother, especially the ones of the trees and mountains. Finally Sai went and got the medic.

This time Lord Danzo allowed Sai to remain with Shin. ~Perhaps he will learn that feelings and emotions only bring pain.~ Danzo thought. ~ Now he will learn why there is no place for feelings in the root.~

Shin knew his time was getting short. He started having periods of unconsciousness and fitful sleep. He would wake up and tell his younger brother of the things they had done together only to find out they were hallucinations. He longed to have those adventures with his brother. And in his own way, Sai too wished they could do these things. Sometimes Shin was in such pain that Sai felt helpless and a tear or two would spill from his eyes. Then Sai would pull himself back to reality and recite "In Root you have no name. you have no feelings."

Sai stared at Shin's body. He was confused, what were these feelings? How are you suppose to feel when one's brother dies. The best way he could describe it was a loss. But with Lord Danzo standing next to him, checking his face for emotion, he could only stand there and pretend there were no feelings. He felt Danzo's hand on his shoulder. Danzo's voice was low "It only hurts if you have feelings."

Sai turned and walked out of the room that he and his brother had shared. He realized he hurt, but not physically. It was an inside hurt that he had never felt before and it was very painful. Danzo is right. He would not be in this pain if he had listened to his Master. If he had controlled his feelings and not let them get in the way he would not hurt now. There would be no pain.

Sai sat on his bed looking at the picture book. The pain inside was horrible "I will never again have feelings and bonds for anyone. I promise I will never again have these feelings. Danzo said I was the best of all the Root members It is time I act like it. I will no longer allow feelings." A single tear slid down his cheek and splashed on the blank center page. Sai closed the book and placed it in the bottom of his bag, closed it up and walked out to the training ground.

Author Notes: Now that you have read my story I hope you will take a few moments to review and let me know you thoughts. What you liked, what you didn't like. The only way I know how I did, is if you leave a review. Special thanks to Himeflye and her idea of the use of the ink. Hope you all have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday. – Mommy Bear


End file.
